Mental Health, Mental Illness, Music and Therapy

Why I Can’t Stop Listening to Linkin Park’s New Song “Heavy”

I’ve been a Linkin Park fan for over ten years now.

And let’s be honest, I go on..and on…and on about how their music has helped me through some of the most difficult moments in my life.

I’m a firm believer that music can heal just as well as medication and therapy. For me, blaring LP in my ear buds and screaming  into my pillow has been just as therapeutic as crying to my therapist during a counselling session.

A lot of LP’s songs have provided me with comfort and a lot of reflection through the years, especially early on in my diagnosis with PTSD.

So of course, when Mike Shinoda’s teased a video of him playing a somber piano tune, I was STOKED!
LP has a new album?

LP has a new album!

My inner alt-rock teen was screaming!

So when they launched their new single, “Heavy” featuring Kiiara a few days ago, I was instantly in love and pre-ordered the new album.

While the song caught my attention for a few reasons – the fact LP collaborated with a female artist for the first time (ever!) during their career, the sad undertone of the piano melody, the somber tone of Chester Bennington’s vocals (sans screaming). While all of these made for the perfect first single, something more caught my attention.

I was hooked immediately by the first few lyrics.

“I don’t like my mind right now.
Stacking up problems that are so unnecessary
Wish that I could slow things down
I wanna let go but there’s comfort in the panic.”

Wait a second…

Are…are they talking about mental health?

Cue uncontrollable fangirl screaming!

While LP have been no stranger to discussing the lows of life or the darkest moments of someone’s mind, I felt “Heavy” stood out above all the rest. Out of all their songs, the message seemed crystal clear.

They were lamenting about the pain and struggles with living with a mental health issues; the struggles with coming to terms with an invisible pain while others dismiss it.

The message was…Wow. Just absolutely powerful.

I had goosebumps by the time the chorus played.

And the song only continued to get better as the rhythm repeated in my ear buds.

“You say that I’m paranoid
But I’m pretty sure the world is out to get me
It’s not like I make the choice
To let my mind get so f*****g messy.”

“It’s not like I make the choice to let my mind get so f*****g messy?”

Just…wow.

It’s been a while since a song has really touched me on a deeper level. Besides a few new top hits, it’s been a while since a song (and an LP song at that!) has put into words exactly how I felt…how I’m feeling now, in this moment.

So while I’m ecstatic LP is making another comeback, I am also thankful their first track has made a huge impression on me, and hopefully someone else suffering too.

It’s inspiring to see artists using their craft to bring awareness to mental health issues and the silent struggles many of us face on a deeper (and darker) level. It makes me hopeful. It keeps me determined to keep fighting, not just for myself but for others as well.

But as the old saying goes…

When words fail, (Linkin Park) music speaks.

And as always,

Fight the good fight.

-A

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